mutually exclusive

Tonight I was watching a shit show because the show I wanted to watch was a rerun and my back is in dire straights, so once I'm somewhere, I friggin' well stay put for awhile.

Anyhow, this particular episode of this particular shit show, which is a new show, and one I've only glanced during commercial breaks of my regular show reminded me of something important that seems to be not commonly understood:

Love and abuse are not mutually exclusive.


p.s. In trying to remember the term "mutually exclusive" with a head soggy from codeine I have once again been reminded that Milo's understanding of words and the actual meanings of words are sometimes mutually exclusive. Perhaps due to the fact that he's allergic to reading. Hmmm.

Halloween

So, I'm at a Halloween party.
It's not actually Halloween. But almost, so that counts, I guess.

You may be asking yourself: If you're at a party, why are you blogging? Don't you have something more fun you could be doing right now?
Answer: No.

I've never been one for parties. I always just feel awkward.

Since it's Halloween (almost), people are dressed up all stupid and silly and that is amusing.

I am dressed as a beatnik. It's a lame costume. But I only had 2 hours to come up with it.

So, since I'm a beatnik, I decided to get some great beat poetry to amuse the masses with. Which of course gets me thinking about "So I married an axe murderer" and nothing actually legitimately beatnik.

For your amusement, I will now recite for you the three beat poems by Mike Myers as enunciated in that film:

Poem #1: Woman!


Woman
Woe man
Whoooooooaaaaaa man!

She was a thief
You gotta believe
She stole my heart and my cat

Betty
Judy
Josie and those hot Pussycats

They make me horny
Saturday morny

Girls of cartoons
Won't leave me in ruins

I want to be Betty's Barney

Hey, Jane, get me off
This crazy thing...

... called love


Poem #2: Woman may be a killer

Woman
Woe man
Whooooooaaaaaa man!

We had love not just sex
Is she Mrs. X?

I had to run for my life

Jane, get me off of this crazy thing.....
Called love


Poem # 3: Harriet

Harriet,
Harry Ette
Hard-hearted harbinger of haggis

Beautiful,
bemuséd
Bellicose butcher

Untrusting
Unknowing
Unlovéd?

He wants you back
He screams into the night air

Like a fireman going to a window
That has no fire

Except the passion of his heart

I am lonely
It's really hard
This poem sucks!


HAPPY HALLOWEEEN PEEPS!

Untethered

I was coming untethered
No sleep
They say it could be
The weather
But I know
It's not the change in pressure
That's caused
These unruffled feathers

It's the cause and the cost
Of all this damage
Bubbling to the top
It's the means and the ways
Of this broken clock
And all of my days
So here we go again..

But don't you worry now
There's not cause for alarm
I know what to do
Limiting liability and harm


To fix the ebb and the flow
Of all the things
That don't work right
With a soft voice
And a paper slip
I'll pay for the privilege
Of keeping
My feelings in check

And when you turn around
It will be flattened out
No more flood
No longer drought
Just the even keel
Without the cause and the cost

Beware of emotional outburst

It's been an interesting experiment.

You see, I'm stupid.
I lost three months worth of non-crazy pills and alas I have been without for a month now.
At first, it was okay.
Then slowly the changes started.
First was the crying. Over everything. Over anything. All the time, anywhere.
Then came the anxiety.
And later the highs and lows I'd almost forgotten about. Everything being such a big deal.

The roller coaster of emotions has remained, but I usually manage it. The anxiety is the real problem though. The endless feeling that I've forgotten something huge, or that something terrible is just around the corner.

I am trying to manage though. Telling myself it's all not a big deal. Who cares? Just relax.

In some ways it's been good. Saying things that I need to say, rather than just shrugging and wiping the mud off. But not everyone has enjoyed this trip. Some wish I was more agreeable again.

I will go back to being chemically placated. Just not quite yet.
And until then, mind your p's and q's around me, cause these days I do bite back.